It's tough to succeed as a serial killer

 














​The mysteries of business meetings, thriving on jargon, and the most thankless job in the world are all top of mind this week, among other cautionary tales…

1. If I've spent an hour coming to your meeting, don't burn up another hour on items that I could have read in advance. We don't need to be face to face if all we're doing is reading emails. 
2. And while we’re on the subject of meetings from hell, why is it that the most important person in any meeting is the one who arrives 20 minutes late? How else can we explain the organizer's choice to stop the meeting and review everything that was already covered by the people who showed up on time?
3. I’ve become quite expert at pushing the envelope and thinking outside the box and checking all the boxes and pursuing my passion and shifting my paradigms and giving it 110 percent. Can I take a nap now?
4. Most networking is a hundred people facing each other in a room and pushing cards at whoever is closest. It's a lot like the old commodity trading pits, except nobody makes any money.
5. Every so often, I’ll meet someone who calls himself a “serial entrepreneur,” which usually means he has started several companies, achieved some success with one of them, and is still trying to repeat his big win. In comparison, you have to be successful every time to be called a serial killer. Life is so unfair.
6. The most thankless job in the world is serving on a condo board.
7. Never show anyone how to do anything, ever. Once you demonstrate that you can do it, other people will decide they don’t need to learn it and they’ll want to rely on you the rest of your life.
8. I always envisioned myself as the quarterback of my team, but most days I was really the goalie.

 
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